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In keeping with the theme of watching old movies that I missed, I decided to travel down a detour and watch every episode of “Jersey Shore”. The show was iconic for good and bad reasons, and I felt it fit with the premise of experiencing huge pop culture moments in entertainment now. Similar to the other Movie Club newsletters, I’m going to post my thoughts after watching all six seasons. Without further ado, let’s get into it.
- Stealing from Dungeons & Dragons, Angelina is Chaotic Evil and Deena is Neutral Good. It was so interesting to see how they all bonded together in their disdain of Angelina and how she went out of her way to piss everyone off. It was also a shrewd move to replace her with Deena, who is legitimately one of the dumbest humans I’ve ever witnessed. Deena’s happy-go-lucky spirit was needed to mend the rifts Angelina created, and offset and balance The Situation’s battle with his personal demons.
- There are some super cringeworthy moments that in hindsight were extremely typical of how people interacted with one another between 2009–2012. The producers somehow found 9 of the most shallow human beings ever, and they don’t hesitate to express their affection for Guido Gorilla Juiceheads and their disgust for grenades. I respect consistency though, and they’re extremely consistent throughout all six seasons.
- Speaking of juiceheads, Roger sucks and he sucked from his very first appearance on the show to his last. In an alternate universe, I’d like to see what would’ve happened if all of the roommates remained single. Ronnie & Sammi’s toxic relationship colored all of their interactions in the house, Mike and Paula’s two week relationship was like watching an awful trainwreck, and we got a very boring and very tame Jenni for four and a half seasons while she chased down Roger. The only single ones were Pauly D and Vinny by the end.
- Pauly D is my favorite out of all of the roommates, and there’s periods where he doesn’t even appear in some episodes because he’s so unproblematic. He’s a walking catch phrase, and I’m sure Danny appreciated having him around to constantly create new bankable taglines. Not far behind Pauly are Ronnie and Nicole, who I think mature the most out of all of the roommates by the end.
- Vinny is my least favorite out of all of the roommates. He consistently insulted Angelina and slept with her anyway. He knew Nicole was dating Jionni and slept with her anyway. He always manages to hit below the belt with his insults, but play it off as either sarcasm or being a nice guy. And the less said about his singular pursuit to turn lesbians back into heterosexual women, the better.
- Watching the show made me realize how much I don’t like clubs. Standing around in dim rooms with music blaring, paying for overpriced alcoholic beverages, constantly searching for people to Jersey Turnpike with, nothing about the club scene appeals to me now. And this was before the worldwide pandemic happened. Honestly, how are clubs still in business?
- Lastly, the show made me realize how much I missed college and how I hope everyone gets to experience that level of socializing or fraternizing in some walk of life. Being thrown in to the deep end to find yourself, find how you fit in the world and how you will treat your peers goes a long way towards finding ultimate success in life. And those bonds you form are unbreakable. Now pardon me while I shed a tear and beat the beat up.